So i was sitting at daniris house while everyone was sleeping. and i just stood up sitting just thinkin staring at the clock. sounds weird? whatever. im thinking about the past year whats been going on. &+ i dead ass been a complete bitch when it comes to relationships. i just don't care about no ones feelings. i been hurt over &+ over again. so i do the same to others as others done to me. i just gave myself a reality check &+ i see the mistakes ive made. here i have the best boyfriend in the world &+ i legit take advantage of him. not intentionally i do it without noticing. small shit pushing him laughin when i see guys from my past. i put myself in his shoes &+ i dead ass dont know how he has the patience to look at me &+ still tells me he loves e to my face with a smile. i feel like complete shit about how i treat him &+ im soo soo sorry. never will i cheat on him. but it sees like the shit ive done is creeping up behind me &+ theres no way to change it. &+ after yesterday i feel like im losing him slowly &+ slowly &+ to be honest im terrified. i asked for a second chance &+ he opened himself up to trust me again &+ im abusing it. after yesterday hes the one who apologized but in all honesty its me who should be apologizing. for the way i treat him. he deserves the world and more definitely not how ive been treating him. he dunned everyone for me and i just took advantage.i love him soo soo much. ive lost him more than once. &+ its not a good feeling. i just feel like its going the same way again. =/ but as of today im changing just for him. the games are gonna stop &+ imma just do a coplete change becuase i dead ass dont wanna lose him. but thats only if it isnt too late.